dunston checks in
out of town wedding weekends, oh how I love you.
yes. that's right. another one of my friends look the long walk down the aisle and effectively took himself out of the game. after a year and a half courtship swanger tied the knot. stupid idi.....errr lucky guy, hooked himself a pretty cool and tolerant mate.
I rolled up to dallas saturday morning and was greeted by a crew of valet attendants, and bell hops. a scene straight out of a p. diddy video, complete with rap music spewing out of my speakers. the excitement of my grandiose entrance quickly faded when I realized all I had were twenties so I had to haul my garment bag with me to the front desk, no small bills for the help. this however, did not stop me from stunnin' past a gathering of young ladies who were ready to have tea as I made my way to the elevator bank. they all noticed my ganstah cufflinks, my starched tyrwhitt shirt, show stopping slacks, and my
playah please sunglasses. the creaming of the panties were just getting started.
nathan and I were the firsts to arrive so after checking out my digs we met at the bistro for a cocktail. we were later joined by wg, the groom, and dr. mitchell (fresh off his med school exams). we had a pleasant lunch at the iron cactus. a stark contrast to our not so pg rated conversation rife with tales of going home with fat chicks, girl with red-eyes, dropping his pants at the back forty, telling chicks that he likes to pack in the nude, defacating in stairs, and other not so appropriate stories that could not have been told at the reception during the toasts. good times.
after lunch we went back up to my room to ice the beers down. only problem was at fancy hotels they don't have an ice machine you can mooch ice off. we had to call room service and order 4 buckets to fill one of the sings. that's right
one of the sinks, my bathroom had two. which went perfectly with my toilet phone, walk-in closet, flat screen tv, dvd player, wireless internet, bathrobe, wet bar, sitting area.
as soon as the first beers were cracked, people started showing up with their girlfriends in tow. one of which was trying to get a peek at my man hood while I was stylin' my robe. she later admitted to such at the reception. I didn't really blame her, mine shaft is an awesome sight to behold. I informed when it would be making it's next public apperance and I promised her back stage passes.
moving on, nathan I drove to the smu campus where the wedding was. only instead of going to the perkins chapel, we ended up at hyde park. but we thought it was the correct one, because all the signs stated we were in the HDUMC parking lot, which our drunkselves rationalized to being "h. perkins united methodist church". we quickly realized there was no "h. perkins", but not before sticking out like a boner through sweatpants and after leaving our ficticious chicken stratches on the guest book. we rule.
we made it to the correct one in time, yada yada. the reception was awesome. even more amazing was the fact that we knew a ton of people at another one accross the sitting area in-between the ball rooms. we all pooled the parties together and hit up two bars and completely took over them. jerabaums and the iron cactus. the grooms father bought me a shit load of drinks, and stated that I could come over and visit in in the OC (no shit, he lives there) anytime. got really hammered, locked myself out of the hotel in the fire escape, and had to climb down to the street and back back into the lobby barefoot in my boxers and ask to let back into my room. I'll leave the rest of the juicy details that transpired that evening to protect the innocent.
sincerely,
mitch "godfather" martin
